somebody put me back in school i forget everything i used to know [entries|friends|calendar] Alli [ website | My Space ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

nostalgia [16 Apr 2009|12:22pm] [ mood | nostalgic ] [ music | telepopmusik- just breathe ] it happens everyday. the littlest detail of anything reminds me of something in the past bittersweet. i miss my mother dearly. so so much. just two nights ago i was putting lotion on my legs and i remembered how she used to ask me to do this for her when she no longer could. and it hit me. while i may not be a spitting image of my mom, i am 95% exactly like her. same legs, feet, hands, body, nose. she was one of my best friends. the scent of her is still with me. i can remember her laugh. her cry. her mischievous self. i miss her. i lay awake at night thinking about her. thinking about how much i could be enjoying with her. how much i wish she were with me. and how much people take their parents for granted. some nights, i cant even sleep unless i grab one of the stuffed animals i gave her and sleep with it. its comforting. almost false comfort, but better than nothing. i dont think i could ever tell my dad about this and about how much i think about her. it would devastate him. he's already having hard enough time having lost his soulmate. i couldnt tell him how depressed i get over it. xoxo. 1 | run through

[23 Jan 2009|05:35pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | royksopp ] its nights like last night that i'm really happy that i'm single. i dont deal with bullshit from anyone. i dont have to worry about impressing guys. as much as i wish i had a significant other, i would much rather be alone than be with a boy that is just going to make me suffer and play games with me. run through

15 minute relationship [17 Jan 2009|09:18pm] [ music | val emmich ] and its over. no more. nothing left. he's back to her. and i meant nothing. all he did was lie. oh well. run through

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